VAMPIRE, CHOCOLATE
STR: 4 (60) --- WPR: 6 (90)DEX: 4 (60) --- PER: 7 (105)
AGL: 4 (60) --- PCN: 3 (45)
STA: 5 (75) --- NIACIN: 4.5 mg
ATT: 1/68% --- RIBOFLAVIN: 0.4 mg
MV: L 80†
Experience: 500 Proof of Purchase Points
Hiding in plain sight on your supermarket shelves, the Chocolate Vampire is one of the most diabolical things players may encounter in their investigations. Viewed by most as nothing more than a harmless, comical cereal company mascot, the Chocolate Vampire is actually something much more sinister.
The Chocolate Vampire does indeed “feed” on chocolate. The lair of a Chocolate Vampire is often filled to the rafters with horded candies, cocoas, powders, and other chocolate-flavored foodstuffs. It’s said that smell of the Chocolate Vampire’s lair can be detected a 1/2-mile away. To combat this, the Chocolate Vampire will set up his lair in a location where such a smell is undetectable – the basement of a chocolatier, the attic of a bakery, or in the heart of Hershey, Pennsylvania.
However, the Chocolate Vampire’s need for chocolate goes far beyond that of mere candies. The Chocolate Vampire must also feed on human blood as well, just as a normal vampire. But due to its craving for all things chocolate, the Chocolate Vampire has developed an unsettling ability to convert human bone marrow into spongy chocolate-flavored bits. These “marsh-marrows” are often sprinkled over its chocolate-laden foodstuffs – including breakfast cereals. Due to his seemingly innocuous, bumbling demeanor, he lulls his victims into a sense of false safety, luring them into his sweet-smelling lair where he begins his unholy marrow extraction-and-conversion process.
The Chocolate Vampire is often accompanied by two minions -- a strawberry-scented Conglomerate Man and a blueberry-scented Ghost. He used to be served by a cherry-scented Werewolf and a fruit-scented Mummy as well, until public opinion polls revealed these were kind of lame.
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Golf clap. Very nice.
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